Wisdom from the ages
I remember this coworker from a lifetime ago. He used to cheat on his wife every single week with a different customer. His wife was gorgeous and their little kid adorable, while they were expecting another one. I was curious of his behaviour and why he was doing it. He just said “carpe diem.” Then he mentioned that they had (a) kid(s) because he wanted someone to take care of him when he would get old. This stuck with me for a long time.
Through my current job, I meet a lot of people. I make their Life easier by helping them on a psychological, emotional, physical level.
I’m not going to lie, I see a lot of misery. I see routines. I see addictive behaviours. I see family patterns. I see loneliness. I don’t see a lot of joy.
People I work with are either in the sunset of their Life or disabled due to a physical or psychological trauma. Some are in recovery. Some will never recover. Some are physically healthy. Some have dementia.
What I see is that my patients have lived many different lives: some have worked their entire lives, and did not know anything else. Some have not worked that much, but they became addicted to something. Some had a successful family Life. Some lost children. Some lost their life companion at a young age. They endured Life. They went through it, breathed it in, and they made it. Despite all the traumas, the family feuds, wars, the lack, or abundance of money.
What I feel from most of them is that they are waiting. Waiting for what? Some want to reach a specific age as a milestone, and some tell me daily that they just want to die already. They are fatigued, exhausted, and when the children are still around, the relationship can be quite hostile.
Despite all of that, they carry themselves with such simplicity and dignity. They are beyond pretending, they are beyond caring what people think of them. They are just being. This is pure grace and magic.
How do we reach a point where we just want to die? I don’t have the answer. I’m not at the age where I have to think about that yet. Or am I? Buddhism teaches us that we must prepare for Death. Learn, meditate, talk, walk and breathe Death. Do we really want that? Do we want to face our finitude?
Well, it’s up to us. Being confronted with so much wisdom on a daily basis, I see that it is necessary to prepare for it. Life prepares us for it already, by throwing many things at us. Nothing is inherently good or bad, just the way we react to it, Buddhists say. But we also have the power to prepare for it by the way we are eating, by how we are thinking, by the kind of relationships we are entertaining. By the conscious choices we make, by the meaning we give them. Do those make us healthier, and live longer, or do they bring us closer to Death? Have we conditioned our mind to fear it when it comes, or will we be at peace when it embraces us? How do we want to live this final moment? Just like another day in our Life, this too shall pass. The last decision we will make is so, so precious. How do we want to show up for this final act? Let’s make sure we make the right decision.
With love and gratitude,
Caroline
© Caroline Caanl 2025. All rights reserved.